Playing Trash Man and Other Thoughts About Mom Not Doing All the Chores!

Is cleaning the house a struggle? Is keeping a sense of order like chasing hurricanes from one room to the next?

I had the hardest time maintaining a cleaning schedule and tidiness when I was home every day, all day. It has seemed easier now that the kids are in school and I am working part-time. The truth is we just aren’t home to make the mess. On long weekends, breaks and snow days the house gets wrecked again and I find myself looking for some solutions to gain control.

There are many cleaning schedules, routines, maid services and tv shows to park your kids in front of that all will give you the same product: a clean house! But, I found that they weren’t always the answer I needed. Making messes was done by a group of five people so why couldn’t the cleaning and picking up be done by five people as well?

This is a process. It takes time to train kids how to do things correctly. That time could be used to just clean the room or take out the trash or put the books back on the shelf. But, then like a broken record I would be doing it all again tomorrow.

Training kids is something that takes work and time. Training them is a purpose of motherhood that gets overlooked by our heightened concern for their emotional health, physical exertion, and academic success. Though these are of importance they are also what left me feeling like a disrespected maid, cook and washing machine. The words “Mommy needs help” did not seem to motivate my kids to clean up their messes, put their shoes in their closets or throw away trash.

It is good for our children to learn to work, to be responsible, to see the cause and effect of play and messes but picking up doesn’t come naturally to them. They don't always notice that a clean house brings peace and contentment.

I realized when the work wasn’t titled a chore they begged to help. They liked mopping, they liked doing adult jobs. They liked having independence and they felt pride from working like me.

Our now seven-year-old has always liked trash trucks. Since he was two-years-old he has watched them from the window every week. We have toy trash trucks and even use random buckets to “collect trash” (i.e. toys) that he then dumps into the toy bin with a beeping sound like he is the truck backing up. He has a big imagination and we love playing pretend of all kinds.

So, when it is time for chores I try to make it a time we can have fun working together. We all have specific jobs and do not rotate who does what (this is vital to getting them in a routine and succeeding at the job so you don’t have to redo it). His job is The Trash Man! When he was little he would wear a construction worker orange vest and yellow hard hat as his uniform. Using a kitchen trash bag, he would dump the smaller trash cans into it and carry the big bag outside!

I had to remember that I wanted to have fun too, I like playing with my kids! So, when work needs to get done who says the fun has to stop? Creating habits in our kids and setting their expectations leaves less time for arguing and whining about jobs. That makes more time for cooking together, reading together, going on adventures and sleep!!!